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        I am no longer a health coach…

        And I am SO SO HAPPY!

        For so long I have been putting in countless hours of energy, effort, and stress into creating a business around health and weight loss coaching; many of those hours I spun in circles, hating the process of building the business itself. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my clients— working with them and seeing the impact my coaching has on their lives fills me up SO much. But, my heart hasn’t been in it the way it is supposed to be..and I have been ignoring that message for a very, very long time.

        I’ll rewind a bit. Growing up, I wanted to be a teacher, that is, until I learned that teachers actually don’t get to create their own curriculum…the government does, and that’s immediately when I decided to move on from that dream (impressed with my 7 year old self). Yet part of me always loved teaching, so now I substitute teach, and I adore getting to live one of my childhood dreams out without the full commitment of being a full-time teacher. And, by miles and miles, my favorite part about teaching is when I add in my own bonus lessons on growth mindset, empathy, self-awareness, self-love, visualization/meditation/relaxation techniques and anything mindset related. And, the best best part? The intimate one on one conversations and connections I create with the students (especially the “troubled” ones…it makes me want to do this, even on the side, forever)

        Then, I wanted to be a writer. I always loved writing. But that dream career died as well, but again, like teaching, it came back as I got older, and here I am, writing.

        Then, I took a psychology class my junior year of high school. I was set. I wanted to study the mind, myself, and others, and I knew I wanted to be a therapist. I knew it more than I ever knew anything about myself before. It in some ways became an obsession..for years. The rest of high school and all of my time in college I was set on this dream. BA in psych, then masters/MFT cert. I wanted to help teach people how to be happy, how to control their mind, and be resilient no matter WHAT happens to you.

        When I was 17 I had an epiphany moment that has been the biggest turning point of my entire life..and will likely hold that spot until I die. I read some cheesy quote on the internet (while scrolling for a facebook caption.. 2010, that was definitely a thing). I can’t recall what the quote was, but it was something about how you can CHOOSE to be happy. I’ll never forget the effect it had on me. A lightbulb turned on…no, a whole fucking GALAXY of bright stars turned on. And I was literally never the same.

        I became the “happy” friend, the “positive and optimistic” friend. I was the friend everyone went to for advice, opened up to about the hard stuff, the family member who was (and still often is) the middle man for every conflict, and somewhere along the way I became the therapist for everyone I knew. I have always been the one that people share their darkest secrets with, their most vulnerable side, with my opinion of them never changing. Being this person for the people I care about, sometimes being this source of comfort and safety for people I barely even know…it is something that means the world to me.

        But, getting your masters in marriage and family therapy takes a lot of time and clinical hours. So, after graduation, I paused the MFT dream. I did behavior therapy and fell in love with it. And I started health coaching. I have always wanted to work for myself (notice the trend starting from childhood dreams? I don’t want anyone to control my work..my life). I wanted to help people be healthy. This country is filled with preventable chronic disease and obesity and I couldn’t stand seeing people suffer when making change was IN THEIR CONTROL!

        But, somewhere along the way, my passion died for the whole “physical health, exercise, and weight loss” thing. Honestly, it died a lot.

        The grind of it became unenjoyable, yet id come home from work everyday and continue to grind away into a cycle of overwhelm and burnout…so many times. Id push and grind into building my coaching business, get stressed to the point of physical pain, burn out, and take a forced break. Repeat.

        Somewhere in this time, I made my health coaching business about mental health. Even when I didn’t try to. I tried to focus on nutrition and exercise (two HUGE passions of mine, seriously, they are some of my favorite topics to learn about), but my heart would still find a way to focus on mental health. Always. And to be honest, almost every post about PHYSICAL health was forced. I thought I just “had to” talk about those things. Even though id rather learn it than coach it…any day.

        I felt this in my heart, yet I still forced myself into it. And each time id have some kind of break down (in any area of life), I would always think “I’m going to get my masters, im going to be an MFT”. And id cycle through this so many times. Recently I came back to this MFT thing, yet again. I started to look into grad programs and for what feels like the millionth time, seriously considered taking that path. But, I used the emotion I felt as literal emotional and energetic fuel to create some big changes. So, here it goes!

        My passion for mental health became stronger than ever after a very traumatic spring/summer of 2018. I started going to therapy, and when I first met the Psychologist for my second meeting, as broken as I felt, he saw through my apparent PTSD and asked me “why are you not a therapist?” I laughed, and said “I know, I know”. He spent the rest of the appointment trying to convince me to go back to school to be an MFT. This doctor even offered me an internship at his practice….AT MY OWN APPOINTMENT FOR MY PERSONAL TRAUMA! It was so beautifully insane to see this doctor see right through my pain the way he did. He could see who I was underneath it all and wanted me as a therapist in HIS practice… Do you know how insanely hard of an offer that is to pass up?

        And he wasn’t even my own therapist, he just required me to visit every so often to make sure I was mentally stable, in all truth. But MY own therapist has told me to become an MFT several times. And each time, my response to her is an “I know, I know”. With two insanely experienced & educated sources encouraging me to pursue this path, it is VERY hard to turn down. I always come back to it.

        But, why don’t I? Because I dont need 2 years & 3,000 clinical hours (literally) to be a therapist: AKA to successfully and bad-assfully transform the mental health of my clients. I dont. I have a confidence deep in me that grows every day. I know im meant to do this work, and I am aware of interpersonal & interpersonal skills that make this work come so natural to me. There is room for growth and learning, YES. But, do I need debt and a piece of paper to have that either? My answer always: HELL NO. I want to help others but also live a life of freedom: my coaching, my schedule, my price. I want to work from home not only so I can do this important work when and how I want..but, so I can sleep when I want, cuddle when I want, travel when I want, read when I want, and stay at home with my kids for as long as I want. I am building the life of ultimate freedom for myself.
        That is the dream.

        So, I finally decided to change my business. Im going to focus on the transformations I am best at. The ones that light me up. The ones that make me feel most ME. The ones that I was put on this earth to create. Mental health.

        After my crazy emotional quarter-life crisis of 2018, I am stronger, happier, more confident, and overall just BETTER than I have ever been before the whirlwind shatters that struck my life.

        I want to be your PROOF that you can go through the hard shit and come out a better person for it. You dont have to be a victim to your past. Or your present. Or your feared future. You can rewire your brain (this is scientifically proven!) and I am determined to spend my life training people how to do so. I am here to empower YOU to unlock your full potential for happiness.

        My coach, Heath, was vital in pushing me to finally take this leap. To drop my fears, to let go of a dream that was no longer mine, and to finally take the leap.

        Every breakdown I have leads to a breakthrough. I make sure to create something badass and beautiful out of EVERY “bad” thing that happens to me. The harder the blow, the bigger the motivation to make it all totally completely worth it. And, thats what I want to teach you: how to let your BREAK DOWNS become your BREAK THROUGHS.

        You are meant to be the hero of your story, and I am going to show you how to develop the mental freedom to start being the hero of your whole LIFE.

        I am obsessed with personal growth, goal setting, action taking, and cultivating an expert mindset in areas of happiness, ambition, resilience, confidence, connection, and authenticity. And my mission? To consistently master my own mind and to teach you how to MASTER YOURS! You just have to be committed to rewiring your brain. You have to love yourself so much that you will do anything to feel happiness and live a healthy life.

        And a serious never-ending thank you full of endless love and gratitude to my first mentor, teacher, coach, and big sister I never had, Cassandra Bodzak for teaching me everything she is..she was the first (out of 2) people I have ever met that I wanted to be like “when I grow up” , she has gotten me through the hardest shit that life has thrown at me time and time again and I cannot be more grateful. @cassandrabodzak

        And my new coach, Heath. For having my back when I lose sight of my vision. For giving me endless support, enthusiasm, encouragement, and guidance when I need it most (24/7). And, for reminding me of how amazing I am when I just want to break down and cry because life feels too heavy. @collidedscopes

        I’m happier than I have ever been and feel more aligned with my path than ever. This leap feels SO GOOD!!!! PS, my new IG is @coachingbyaly — I have chills sharing my next step, IM SO READY FOR THIS! (I’m still working on reconstructing my website, but until then, there are past blogs for dayzzzz!)